Have I Told You Lately?
This
week, I got a cryptic text from my adult daughter. No context, just a question:
What does the research say about praise?
I
was in the middle of a busy day, so I didn’t stop to ask questions. I just sent
an equally quick response: Praise effort more than talent. Be specific.
A
couple of days later, I shared this same advice with coaches and asked for
examples of praise that was specific or effort-focused. Two coaches were quick
to jump in and share wonderful things about teachers they are working with.
One
said, “Peter is so good at listening to students. He always puts them first. It
makes his instruction so much stronger. When students are working, he is having
conversations with them, one-on-one, that start by acknowledging where they are
and then push them forward.”
Another
coach described the amazing STEM lesson a teacher had just taught, where
students worked effectively in small groups to solve a problem in a scenario connected
with their unit on immigration. Students got their hands on materials and
worked collaboratively. Because of the pandemic, we haven’t been doing anything
like that this year. But restrictions eased about a week ago. The coach described
how pleased she was that this teacher took the risk, in April, to diverge from year-long
routines. The lesson, she said, was a great success.
If
was clear the coaches recognized the value of what these two teachers were
doing. They sang their praises to our group of coaching colleagues. But my next
question cut them short. “Have you told them?”
Although
both coaches recognized the teachers’ strengths, they had not taken the time to
say so. Maybe because some coaching models discourage use of praise. Maybe
because they are so focused on improvement that they are looking for things to
change rather than things to applaud.
Because
my research with the GIR model clearly identifies affirmation and praise as
effective coaching moves, I confidently encouraged these coaches to think about
specific, focused praise they could offer. We took a few minutes to get this
specific praise down in writing on the GIR Conferencing Plan (see below).
Because if we don’t plan for it, it may not happen. And praise it too
important. We can’t let the opportunity slide.
During
this coaching session, I had the song, “Have I Told You Lately,” rolling
through my head. (My dad was a country-western singer, so it was the Hank
Williams version rather than the Rod Stewart one you may now be humming!). Even
though coaching may not be about love, the song’s reminder is relevant. Ask
yourself: Have I told teachers lately about the good things they are doing? If
not, maybe its time to do so. In the words of Hank Williams, “Well, darling, I’m
telling you now!”
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