Coaching Questions for Problem-Solving

***********************************************************************************************************************

You can find My Coaches Couch, the podcast (with different content) in your favorite podcast app or at MyCoachesCouch.podbean.com.

*******************************************************************************************************************************************

Asking questions is a powerful coaching move, and it’s one that you can use not only
during the school year, but also this summer with friends and family. One important role that questions play is to support problem solving.

When a knowledgeable teacher comes to you with a problem, asking questions encourages the teacher to generate her own solutions. Similarly, when a friend or family member comes to you with a problem, asking questions can be a “just right” move that leaves ownership for the solution with them.
 
This week, a family friend asked my husband for advice about his next job move. My husband asked questions and offered some thoughts, but he steered away from making a recommendation Mostly, he didn’t want this young friend telling his parents, “Mr. Collet thinks I should…” or “Mr. Collet agrees with me.” 😊 Regardless of his motives, my husband’s questions were a problem-solving support.
 
When a friend or colleague comes to you with a problem, you could say, “That’s a great question! I’ve got some ideas, which I’ll share with you. But before I do, what are your first thoughts?” After a surprised pause, the person may throw out a fledgling idea and then wait for your response.  That’s your cue for the next question (a powerful one!): “What else could you do?” After the next idea and subsequent pause, prompt again: “And what else?” After generating several possibilities, you can encourage the friend to consider which of these ideas seem worth trying first. When you ask teachers this simple sequence of questions, you have promoted DIY coaching: the teacher generates options and chooses the best course. And all it takes is a few good questions from you!
 
I used this approach several years ago when working with teachers in Haiti. A large room held 40 teachers seated at eight tables, representing eight nearby orphanage schools. With the assistance of a translator, I asked each table group to make a chart, listing persistent problems they were experiencing. Then I asked them to put a star by one problem that they really wanted a solution for.
After doing so, the teachers looked to me expectantly. I had already noticed how these teachers turned respectfully to me for answers, but at this moment, I knew that was not my role. So, I told them: talk with your group and make a list of possible solutions to the problem you chose. 
 
They looked at me with shocked surprise. “We don’t know how to solve these problems,” they said. “We have already tried.”
 
I was the educational expert from the States. I was the one standing at the front of the room. I was the one who had come to offer support. Surely I would give them a solution!
 
But I knew I didn’t have the real answers to their persistent problems. They knew their students and their situation in a way I never could. Besides that, I would be leaving in a few days and taking my answers with me. They needed confidence that they could find their own answers. 
 
I moved from table to table, asking a few questions about the problem they had identified and encouraging them to make a long list of possibilities before deciding how to move forward.  Although one table (led by a vocal, experienced teacher) claimed they had already tried everything and there were no new ideas to list, teachers at the other seven tables brainstormed and then determined a course of action. There was energy in the room and fierce determination. These teachers felt empowered to solve their own problems.
 
Although these Haitian teachers initially felt reliant on me for solutions, when my questions encouraged thoughtfulness and persistence, their efficacy increased and they crafted their own potential solutions. The same can be true for friends and family who come to you for advice this summer, and later for the teachers you work with when school is back in session. Ask:
 
“What are your first thoughts about that?”
“What else could you do?”
“And what else?”
Then “Which of these ideas seem worth trying first?”
 
Questions like these build problem-solving skills that friends, family members, and teachers can continue using in the future as new challenges arise.
 
This week, you might want to take a look at:

This podcast episode about what it’s like to be an instructional coach:
 
https://www.cultofpedagogy.com/instructional-coach/
 
 
Integrated phonics instruction works better (great article, even with the ad at the end):
 
https://www.heinemann.com/blog/why-early-reading-skills-should-be-taught-together-not-in-isolation
 
Using theater games to inspire writing:
https://www.edutopia.org/article/games-encourage-students-write
 
 
A getting-to-know-you activity: Students create their ideal bookshelf:
 
https://choiceliteracy.com/article/my-ideal-bookshelf-books-that-educate-us/
 
 
This video with 5 key roles of an instructional coach:
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtlVavxZBrk&t=196s
 
 
That’s it for this week.  Happy Coaching!
 
Want more coaching tips? Check out my book, Differentiated Mentoring & Coaching in Education: From Preservice Teacher to Expert Practitioner, available from Teachers College Press!  I’m so excited to share it with you! You can use the code: JUN2026 for 15% off. Click  here  and I’ll email you the free Book Group Study Guide that includes questions, prompts, and activities you can use as you share the book with colleagues.  I hope you’ll love this book as much as I loved making it for you!

Lead by Listening

Your role as an instructional coach is a unique kind of leadership. You are not an administrator, supervisor, or evaluator. You are a colleague who lifts and supports. One of the most beneficial ways you can exercise this role is to lead by listening. Even though it’s summer, you can keep practicing this important attribute. It will serve you well in the relationships that matter. The same habits that strengthen coaching conversations can deepen dinner conversations now and make your leadership more effective when school starts again.
 
Listening Builds Trust
When teachers feel like someone is genuinely interested in their thinking rather than simply waiting to offer advice, they're more willing to be vulnerable, take risks, and reflect honestly. The same is true outside of school. Think about the people you enjoy talking with most. They're probably the ones who ask thoughtful questions and stay curious instead of turning the conversation back to themselves.
 
Listening communicates something powerful: You matter, and your thinking matters. Trust grows from that simple message.
 
Understand Before Responding
Coaches can feel the urge respond quickly: to offer a strategy, share a resource, or tell a story from our own experience. But leadership begins with understanding before responding.
 
Instead of immediately recommending, you might ask:
 
*What's making this situation especially challenging?
*What have you considered so far?
*What options feel realistic to you?
 
Those questions invite thinking instead of dependence. They communicate confidence in the other person's ability to find a way forward and your support for helping them move in that direction.
 
Listening Creates Collaboration
When leaders do most of the talking, people wait for the next direction or recommendation. They become compliant. When leaders do more listening, people become collaborators.
 
When coaches lead by listening, teachers begin connecting ideas and generating their own solutions because the conversation belongs to them. Our role as coaches is to support this thinking by asking more questions – questions to help the teacher focus and clarify. We can also offer our own insights, but only after first listening deeply.
 
Listening Reveals Strengths
When leaders listen carefully, they hear values, successes, effort, and expertise—not just problems. This connects naturally to asset-based coaching.
 
You might hear a commitment to student relationships, creativity, rigor, or confidence. Naming those strengths helps teachers recognize what they're already doing in their practice.
 
The same habit changes personal relationships. When we listen for strengths instead of shortcomings, conversations become more encouraging and more hopeful.
 
Listening Can Be Uncomfortable
Real listening requires patience. Silence, emotion, or ambiguity may tempt leaders to take over the conversation. But leadership means staying present instead of immediately steering.
 
There may be silence while someone gathers their thoughts. There may be emotion that needs to be expressed, but not solved. There may be uncertainty that feels messy.
 
Those moments often tempt us to jump in with recommendations or redirect the conversation toward action. There’s a time for recommendations and action, but don’t go there too quickly.
 
A thoughtful pause gives people permission to keep thinking aloud, and often the most important insights emerge after the silence.
 
Practice “Lead by Listening” Moves
This summer – and later, in the new school year – here are a few intentional listening habits to practice:
 
* Pause before responding.
* Listen for emotion, not just content.
* Reflect back what you're hearing.
* Ask one more question before offering a recommendation.
* Resist turning the conversation to your own story.
*Listen for quieter voices in group conversations.
* Validate before problem-solving.
 
None of these practices require special training – just special effort and intention. Summer gives us dozens of opportunities to practice: vacations, neighborhood conversations, and ordinary moments with family and friends.
 
And when August arrives, you'll return to your coaching role more ready to lead by listening.
 
****************************************************************************************
You can find My Coaches Couch, the podcast (with different content) in your favorite podcast app or at MyCoachesCouch.podbean.com.
 
****************************************************************************************
This week, you might want to take a look at:

Replace general praise with something specific:
 
https://www.cultofpedagogy.com/edutips/edutip11/
 
As a coach, it helps to be likeable.  J  Here are 13 habits of likeable people (maybe we can work on these over the summer!):
 
https://www.forbes.com/sites/travisbradberry/2015/01/27/13-habits-of-exceptionally-likeable-people/
 
The cognitive benefits of writing by hand:
https://www.edutopia.org/visual-essay/why-writing-by-hand-beats-typing-in-6-charts
 
Navigating tricky conversations with young children:
 
https://choiceliteracy.com/article/navigating-complex-conversations-with-young-children/
 
 
What principals do differently at schools where teachers stay:
 
https://www.cultofpedagogy.com/teachers-leaving/
 
That’s it for this week.  Happy Coaching!
 
Want more coaching tips? Check out my book, Differentiated Mentoring & Coaching in Education: From Preservice Teacher to Expert Practitioner, available from Teachers College Press!  I’m so excited to share it with you! You can use the code: JUN2026 for 15% off. Click  here  and I’ll email you the free Book Group Study Guide that includes questions, prompts, and activities you can use as you share the book with colleagues.  I hope you’ll love this book as much as I loved making it for you!
 

5 C’s of Motivation: Not Just for Students

Whether we're thinking about students, teachers, coaching, or even ourselves during the summer months, 5 factors make a difference when it comes to motivation: control, choice, challenge, connection, and construction of meaning.
 
Control
Control is the feeling that our actions matter, that we can have an influence on what happens. Control is the belief that our effort, decisions, and actions have an impact on the outcome.
 
This summer, you can recognize the impact of control in the tasks you do and those you see others do. There’s a difference between spending a day completing obligations chosen by someone else versus doing a project you've decided to tackle yourself. Whether it's learning a new skill, tackling a home improvement project, or organizing a neglected space, control fuels persistence.
 
In classrooms, control might look like students deciding how to approach a task, setting goals, monitoring their progress, or reflecting on their learning. Even when everyone is working toward the same learning target, students are more motivated when they feel ownership over the process.
 
This same principle applies to coaching. Teachers are more invested when they help identify the focus of coaching conversations, determine next steps, and evaluate their own progress. When coaching becomes something done with teachers rather than to teachers, motivation increases.
 
When motivation seems low, we can consider: Is there an opportunity for meaningful influence over the process?
 
Choice
Choice means having options. At home, choice may be one reason summer feels refreshing. We can choose which book to read, which hobby to pursue, or how to spend a free afternoon.
 
For teachers, choice might look like offering students a choice between two books, selecting a project topic, or deciding whether to make an oral presentation, a video, or a written product. For coaches, choice might mean offering teachers different ways to engage in professional learning.
 
Having choices allows learners to align tasks with their interests and preferences, which makes learning more inviting and personal. To consider how choice is influencing motivation, we can ask: Do the choices offered feel meaningful and create opportunities for ownership?
 
Challenge
Having the right level of challenge influences motivation: too easy, and we’re not motivated; too hard, and we’re not motivated. The sweet spot offers just the right level of difficulty – we can accomplish it, but it’s a stretch. Effort and thinking are required, but it still feel attainable. Productive difficulty means there’s a bit of a struggle, but not discouragement. Are you stretching yourself this summer, tackling a task that you really have to reach for?
 
Teachers’ motivation might be high when they take on a goal that pushes them beyond their current comfort zone. Students can feel motivation to tackle a complex problem or persevere through a difficult concept with support. As a coach, you’ve probably found yourself looking for this “just right” tension. With novice teachers, I’m often considering which of the things I’ve noticed will be most beneficial to bring up – what is an instructional aspect that is almost within reach?
 
Motivation increases when success is not guaranteed, but growth feels possible. To check on this characteristic, we can ask: Is the work stretching without overwhelming?
 
Connection
When we see how the new thing we are doing connects with past learning and experiences, we feel more motivated. Learning matters when we see connections to other people, real purposes, our own community, or our identity.
 
Outside of work, connection is often what draws us into activities in the first place. We volunteer because we care about a cause. We spend time with family because relationships matter. We learn new skills because they align with our interests or identity.
 
In classrooms, connection might involve linking content to previous learning and experiences or helping students see how learning applies beyond school. In coaching, connection often begins with relationships and grows when coaching conversations focus on goals that matter to the teacher and the students they serve.

 
When motivation is lacking, it can be helpful to ask: “How does this connect with what I know and have experienced? Why does this matter to me, to others, or to the world?”
 
Construction of Meaning
We construct meaning when we are actively making sense of ideas rather than simply receiving information. Instead of memorizing, we interpret, apply, question, and create. Knowledge isn’t delivered, it is built. What new knowledge will you build this summer?
 
Coaching creates space for this sense-making process. Rather than providing all the answers, coaches ask questions that help teachers notice, interpret, and draw conclusions for themselves.
 
Learning feels more motivating when we construct understanding rather than passively consuming information. To check on construction of meaning, we can ask, “Are people making sense of ideas for themselves, or are they simply completing tasks and following directions?”
 
Reflecting on the 5 C’s
For students, teachers, and (really!) anyone trying to do anything, motivation is influenced by the conditions that are created. When there is control, choice, challenge, connection, and construction of meaning, motivation is more likely. Maybe that's one reason we look forward to summer: it might offer more of the conditions that help motivation thrive.
 
****************************************************************************************
You can find My Coaches Couch, the podcast (with different content) in your favorite podcast app or at MyCoachesCouch.podbean.com.
 
****************************************************************************************
 
This week, you might want to take a look at:

Why use humor in the classroom? Here are many reasons:
 
http://www.middleweb.com/5053/humor-in-the-classroom/
 
 
AI research skills for middle-schoolers:
 
https://www.edutopia.org/article/teaching-annotated-bibliography-middle-school
 
 
Making data review more personal:
 
https://choiceliteracy.com/article/making-data-review-more-personal/
 
 
The Big List of Class Discussion Strategies (podcast or text):
 
http://www.cultofpedagogy.com/speaking-listening-techniques/
 
 
You’ll think of lots of uses for this book, 10-Minute Inservice:
 
https://books.google.com/books/about/The_Ten_Minute_Inservice.html?id=fHTCBwAAQBAJ
 
That’s it for this week.  Happy Coaching!
 
Want more coaching tips? Check out my book, Differentiated Mentoring & Coaching in Education: From Preservice Teacher to Expert Practitioner, available from Teachers College Press!  I’m so excited to share it with you! You can use the code: MAY2026 for 15% off. Click  here  and I’ll email you the free Book Group Study Guide that includes questions, prompts, and activities you can use as you share the book with colleagues.  I hope you’ll love this book as much as I loved making it for you!

Pause and Ponder: What Stands Out from Your Coaching This Year?

The districts in my area wrapped up the school year this week, and Sandi took the time to pause with me and reflect on her third year as a coach. We talked of her proud accomplishments and also how she wanted to come back when August rolls around. Sandi is proud of the way she laid a uniform foundation by meeting throughout the year with every team in her school, discussing schoolwide goals. She is proud of how she has moved from putting out fires to a more systemic coaching approach. And she has thoughts about how to take the coaching deeper next year by providing PD, helping teachers select their own related goals, and creating an authentic coaching rhythm that supports teachers in achieving those goals.  
 
If you are no longer moving at full speed with end-of-year meetings, post-conversations, celebrations, classroom cleaning and a long list of things that need attention before summer officially begins, I invite you to pause and ponder; What has this year of coaching meant to you and the teachers you work with? What will you take with you into next year, and what will you leave behind? Coaches spend so much of the year helping teachers reflect that it can be easy to skip reflection for ourselves. Let’s make a space to stop and notice.
 
What’s Worth Celebrating?
Our brains are wired to see the negative – an approach that could serve us well if we were being chased by a predator, but isn’t as useful for our everyday lives (thankfully!). When you pause to think back on this school year, push negative thoughts aside for a moment and consider:
 
*What’s something you’re proud of?
*What was a strong decision you made?
* What effective practices did you see teachers start using?
* Where did you create momentum?
 
Honor the work that you’ve done, noticing what went well. Reflection can help us notice what we might otherwise overlook. It’s worth slowing down long enough to note the impact you’ve had. Growth often shows up in quiet ways.
 
What Stands Out?
As you look back on the year, what stands out? What feels most memorable? What moments do you hope will stay with you? Recognizing significant moments helps us make meaning from our experiences rather than simply moving through them. It helps us reconnect with our purpose. Whether we are noticing the impact of our work or the places where we fell short, revisiting significant moments elevates the lessons learned. We can recognize what we now know about relationships, decision-making, communication, or practice. We see not just what happened, but what mattered.
 
What Was Learned?
As you sit with the year for a moment, looking back on highlights and hard moments, notice the threads that connected your work. Maybe you learned some principles, like slowing down instead of solving problems, distributing the work, or prioritizing relationships. Or maybe it was skills that improved – practical things like how to ask better questions or how to protect your time. Reflection helps experience evolve into wisdom.
 
What Stops?
A fruitful end-of-year question is:
 
*What do you want to leave behind?
 
Framing it this way makes a shift in practice feel like a lighter load. Are there things that didn’t work that you don’t want to repeat? Are there things that were just too much – too much time, too much effort, too much of you doing the problem-solving? Did you overcommit? Strive for unattainable perfectionism? Feel pressured to have all the answers? If you carried something this year that has become too heavy, put it down. Reflection can help you disrupt unproductive patterns.
 
How Do You Want To Come Back?
The things you celebrated might be things to step back into when the new school year starts. Name them. List them. Then you’ll remember them without having that uncomfortable feeling of holding it all somewhere in your brain over the summer.
 
You might also have ideas about stepping in with something new. What’s the next iteration? What do you want to do? What do you want to be? Do you want to be:
 
*More curious?
*More present?
*More focused?
*More courageous?
*More balanced?
 
When I met with Sandi today, the words depth and authentic kept coming to her mind, creating a vision for how she wants to come back.
 
Give Yourself a Gift
Before you step away from this school year, give yourself the gift that you so often give to others: the opportunity to reflect, notice growth, and think forward with hope. Pause and celebrate. Ponder what stands out, what was learned, what stops, and what will start when the new year gets underway. Reflection can remind you why coaching matters.
 
****************************************************************************************
You can find My Coaches Couch, the podcast (with different content) in your favorite podcast app or at MyCoachesCouch.podbean.com.
 
****************************************************************************************
 
This week, you might want to take a look at:

Finding the middle ground – Teaching the pros and cons of AI in ELA:
 
https://www.the74million.org/article/why-the-middle-path-of-ai-literacy-may-be-the-future-of-english-class/
 
 
Teaching morphology in early elementary:
 
https://www.edutopia.org/article/teaching-morphology-elementary-school
 
 
Using drawing meaningfully in ELA:
 
https://choiceliteracy.com/article/three-meaningful-ways-to-incorporate-drawing-in-english-class/
 
The importance of the first 5-years for brain development (brought to you by in this TED talk by a 7-year-old):
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aISXCw0Pi94
 
 
How to increase the chances that your feedback gets heard:
 
https://www.ascd.org/el/articles/creating-a-culture-of-feedback
 
That’s it for this week.  Happy Coaching!
 
Want more coaching tips? Check out my book, Differentiated Mentoring & Coaching in Education: From Preservice Teacher to Expert Practitioner, available from Teachers College Press!  I’m so excited to share it with you! You can use the code: MAY2026 for 15% off. Click  here  and I’ll email you the free Book Group Study Guide that includes questions, prompts, and activities you can use as you share the book with colleagues.  I hope you’ll love this book as much as I loved making it for you!
 

Bottom of Form

 

Coaches as Teachers’ Cheerleaders: In Praise of Praise

It’s the time of year when there’s a count down on the calendar. Even though there are lots of things to get done between now and the end of the school year, it’s important to make space for the positive so that coaches and teachers end the year on a high note. One way to do that is through purposeful, specific praise – the kind of praise that helps teachers see exactly what is working in their practice and why it matters.
 
“That think-pair-share was quick and focused – so effective!”
 
“The photos that you showed got students so excited for their project!”
 
“The Venn diagram really worked as a pre-writing strategy today!”
 
Comments like these not only brighten someone’s day, they reinforce effective instructional decisions. They help teachers recognize the moves worth repeating. When we shine a light on effective practices, we increase the likelihood that those practices will continue. Research shows that praise is an important practice for fostering teacher growth and reflection. Growth flourishes in environments where people feel respected, encouraged, and capable. And when teachers feel effective, students benefit too.
 
A teacher who hears, “The way you focused students on the learning objective and included self-assessment was outstanding,” is likely to intentionally include these practices as an ongoing part of his instruction.  He’ll probably also be a more resourceful problem-solver who looks for creative solutions to help his students grow.  As one teacher explained, “Praise gets me searching for new and innovative things on my own.” 
 
“Great job,” might produce a momentary happy high, but, “Great job – those open-ended questions really got students thinking!” has a lasting impact.
 
I was in a meeting with a group of elementary teachers when they started reminisced about a favorite principal from years earlier. “She was in our rooms so much, sometimes we didn’t even notice she was there,” they said.  “Then we’d find a note in our box pointing out something we’d done well.”  “It made me want to try harder,” a teacher said.  “I wanted to be as good as she thought I was,” said another. Praise motivated these teachers to try harder and be better.  It lifted them and encouraged them to keep going, even when the going got hard.
 
Praise provides encouragement. At this busy time of year, a small moment of recognition can be the thing that keeps a teacher going. When coaches notice and name effective practice, we help teachers see their own strengths more clearly.
 
Rita Pierson famously said that every child deserves a champion. I think teachers do, too. Instructional coaches are uniquely positioned to be those champions — people who cheer teachers on by noticing growth, celebrating progress, and reminding teachers how much their work matters.
 
****************************************************************************************
You can find My Coaches Couch, the podcast (with different content) in your favorite podcast app or at MyCoachesCouch.podbean.com.
 
****************************************************************************************

 

Ideas for end-of-year learning:
 
https://www.middleweb.com/29647/make-end-of-year-learning-meaningful-fun/
 
 
The value of rereading picture books:
 
https://teachersbooksreaders.com/2021/02/22/read-them-again-and-again-and-again/
 
 
Reasons and resources for teaching empathy:
 
https://www.edutopia.org/blog/empathy-classroom-why-should-i-care-lauren-owen
 
 
Vocabulary activities fun enough for the end of the year:
 
https://choiceliteracy.com/article/quick-vocabulary-practice-and-assessment/

Happy to be #10 on this list:
 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-L4wmooudw 

That’s it for this week.  Happy Coaching!
 

This week, you might want to take a look at:

Coaching in the Home Stretch: Finishing Strong with Reflection & Celebration

We’re coming into the home stretch. It’s May.  In many places, testing is behind us, and what remains is the delightful work of wrapping up the year. The calendar is still full, but the tone has shifted—there’s a sense of celebration in the air. Teachers feel a bit more flexibility, and there’s a shared desire to finish on a high note.
 
For instructional coaches, this stretch is about putting the finishing touches on what’s been done—showcasing growth, reflecting on progress, and honoring the effort it took to get here.
 
The Finale of a Coaching Cycle
 
This time of year marks the natural closing of coaching cycles. Think of this as your swan song – not an ending, but a finale—one that reflects confidence in what teachers can now do independently.
 
You’ve worked alongside teachers, helping them try new practices, refine their instruction, and respond to student needs. Now, those practices have become part of their repertoire.
 
As you near the end of a coaching cycle, you are naming strong decisions and celebrating effective practices. Specific, personalized praise becomes the most appropriate and powerful coaching move. That’s what happened in my end-of-year coaching conversation with Norah.
 
After watching a lesson in Norah’s classroom, we sat down together and I asked, “Thinking back on the math lesson, what stands out to you?”  She launched into a description of how she used their morning work to transition into the lesson; she started the description by saying, “Something that I really liked was…” She said she was able to “prime their minds” for the upcoming lesson. I loved that phrase and used it in my follow-up comment. “Yes, it primed them for it – they were ready to think about fractions.”
 
Because Norah started our conversation with a discussion of the beginning of the lesson, I didn’t want to pass up the opportunity to talk about another positive aspect of the start. After affirming the smooth transition from morning work to math lesson, I asked her to talk about her decision to start the lesson by “hooking them on the why.” Before launching into the math content, Norah had asked students, “Why are we even talking about fractions? When do we use fractions?” Norah wanted students to recognize that what they were learning was actually relevant to their lives. Responding to Norah’s question, students launched into a long list of ways fractions could show up in their lives: cooking, measuring, construction, cutting up bread, making video games, and even middle-school science class.
 
I tied Norah’s description back to a topic we’d talked about together many times: class discussion. The goal had been for students to take more ownership for whole-class discussions, rather than ping-ponging back and forth between teacher and student – and it happened during this discussion, as students built off of one-another’s ideas about the relevance of fractions. That was something to celebrate!
 
During this final coaching conversation, even the one recommendation I made was wrapped up in an affirmation. Something I’d noticed as Norah listed students’ ideas about fraction use on the board was that many of the comments were morphed into something for future job use; when students talked about cooking, Norah mentioned a job as a cook or baker; when they talked about measuring, Norah mentioned a job in construction. When they talked about measuring in middle-school science, she talked about a career as a scientist. While career insights were worth highlighting, I wanted to make sure Norah recognized the value of the more-immediate applications students were bringing up. So as our discussion of the discussion continued, I said, “That makes me think about…” and I brought up the middle-school science lab example mentioned by a student. Norah nodding, remembering. Then I said, “I thought that comment was especially interesting, because it wasn’t about the long-term future, it was about something they’d been thinking a lot about – that transition to middle school. That seemed like a really authentic, important connection.” Norah brightened up, “It was a point of excitement!” she said, launching into a description of their enthusiasm about both science and middle school and saying, “I definitely think that was an authentic connection.”
 
Our conversation continued as Norah and I took turns bringing up positive parts of the lesson: Her effective modeling, giving students classroom responsibilities, using all-respond techniques (and expecting all to respond!). We talked about her probing questions (“How do you know?”) and even the specific words she used, as I commented: “I loved the way you framed the practice by saying, ‘You’re about to get a chance to show what you know as far as ordering fractions goes.” Norah and I talked about the power of those words.
 
This is what the end of a coaching cycle can look like: a conversation filled with specific, grounded praise that helps a teacher see just how far they’ve come.
 
Making Space for Reflection

One of the greatest gifts coaches can offer teachers is the chance to pause and reflect. In the rush to finish everything on the checklist, it’s easy to overlook the good things happening and just how much growth has occurred. Creating intentional space for reflection allows teachers to see that their hard work has paid off.
 
Sometimes this happens naturally within coaching conversations, like it did with Norah. Other times, it’s helpful to build in structured opportunities.  During team meeting in May, I’ve let music prompt reflection, playing the Beatles song, “In My Life,” followed by Trace Adkins’s, “You’re Gonna Miss This,” while teachers reflected on their best memories of the year, what would stick with them, and how they had changed. Then they shared a memory or celebration with their shoulder partner. The mood in the room was noticeably brighter. 
 
A creative twist on supporting teacher reflection is to ask teachers to reflect on each others’ successes. The “Strength Circle” protocol offers this opportunity.  Each teacher is given an envelope and a blank piece of paper.  They write their name on the outside of the envelope, fold the blank paper, and tuck it inside.  Then everyone gathers in a circle. Once in a circle, everyone passes their envelope to the right. With each passing of the envelope, teachers take out the paper and write a strength they recognize in their peer. Encourage them to describe a specific time they noticed this strength. After a minute or so, the paper goes back in the envelope and the envelope is passed. Repeat several times to give each teacher a happy list of strengths they can celebrate and continue to cultivate. This activity can be done with teams or the whole faculty and staff (be sure participants know each other well enough to be specific about strengths). Moments of reflection shape how teachers carry their work forward.
 
Appreciation Lasts
 
The final coaching conversations of the year can be lighter, more reflective, and filled with affirmation. As teachers revisit goals that once felt distant, they recognize the good work they’ve done. When we help teachers see their strengths clearly, we celebrate and also set the stage for continued growth.
 
As you move through these final weeks, celebrate the wins, both big and small. Finishing strong isn’t about doing more—it’s about seeing, and helping others see, how much has already been accomplished.
 
When my efforts are focused on helping teachers recognize their strengths, I’ve noticed that I am more buoyant!  This work of affirmation not only benefits the teacher, it lifts us, too.
 
****************************************************************************************
You can find My Coaches Couch, the podcast (with different content) in your favorite podcast app or at MyCoachesCouch.podbean.com.
 
****************************************************************************************
 
This week, you might want to take a look at:

An end-of-year teacher reflection template:
 
https://wpvip.edutopia.org/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/Edutopia_Copy_of_Reflections_and_Directions_Table_Version_-_Google_Docs.pdf
 
 
Student-planned end-of-year celebration:
 
https://choiceliteracy.com/article/student-planned-end-of-year-celebration/
 
 
Maximizing coaching in the month of May:
 
https://dianesweeney.com/maximizing-coaching-month-may/
 
 
How to supercharge adult learning:
 
https://learningforward.org/2026/04/21/supercharging-your-adult-learning-its-better-together/
 
 
Pros and cons of homework:
 
https://www.edutopia.org/article/whats-right-amount-homework
 
That’s it for this week. Happy Coaching!
 
Want more coaching tips? Check out my book, Differentiated Mentoring & Coaching in Education: From Preservice Teacher to Expert Practitioner, available from Teachers College Press!  I’m so excited to share it with you! You can use the code: APR2026 for 15% off. Click  here  and I’ll email you the free Book Group Study Guide that includes questions, prompts, and activities you can use as you share the book with colleagues.  I hope you’ll love this book as much as I loved making it for you!

Confidence that Makes Space: Coaching with Curiosity

As coaches, it’s important to be confident about what we bring to the table. You were hired as a coach because you have knowledge of content and pedagogy.  You know how to teach effectively.  Your job is to help others in their pursuits of improvement, and you have a lot to give. But effective coaches balance confidence with curiosity, recognizing that they know a lot, but they don’t know everything. They look to the teachers to find out what they know – about their students, about their class’s history, and about themselves as teachers. 
 
Confidence v. Pride
 
Confidence is a recognition of our own capability. It’s self-efficacy—the belief that we can make a difference in classrooms and in the lives of teachers and students. And as coaches, we need that!
 
But pride? That will not serve us well. Pride leans toward ego. It shows up as needing to be right, needing to be seen as the expert, or walking into a conversation with our minds already made up. And when that happens, the door to dialogue, trust, and partnership closes.
 
Confidence with Curiosity
 
Confidence in coaching doesn’t mean knowing everything. It means offering what you know while staying genuinely open to what the teacher knows. When we approach conversations with curiosity, we signal that we value teachers’ expertise. We position ourselves not as the one with answers, but as a partner in thinking.
 
It feels easy to jump in with a recommendation when a teacher asks for help. But often, a more powerful move is to pause and ask a curious question that allows the teacher to surface her own thinking.
 
When reviewing student work, we might ask, “What is really important to you in this assignment?” When a teacher says she wants students to be able to show their thinking, we might authentically ask, “What does that look like to you?” Authentic questions like these seek the teachers’ perspectives and insight.
 
Recently, I had a coach-the-coach conversation with Angela, an instructional coach who brings lots of experience and expertise to her work. As she talked about the coaching work she was doing, I noticed that our conversation focused mostly on what Angela was observing and her ideas for moving forward. She had noticed, for example, that students were hesitant to jump into whole group conversations, so she had shared ideas with the teacher about setting up small-group instruction. I wondered whether the teacher might feel like things were being done to her or for her, rather than with her. So I asked, “What other ideas has the teacher had about how to increase students’ engagement and participation? What other ideas have teachers brought to the table that might fit in with your vision?” These questions prompted Angela to take a curious stance that elevated the teacher’s voice.
 
A curious stance carries positive assumptions. You communicate respect. You communicate, “You are thoughtful.” “You are observant”. “You are capable.” Over time, those messages build the teacher’s confidence—and that supports lasting change.
 
Because when teachers feel both respected and capable—when they feel seen for what they already know—coaching becomes something powerful: it is shared learning, where both people grow.
 
Confidence with Humility
 
C.S. Lewis said, “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less.” Humility is a mindset about how we approach those we are working with. Are we stand-and-deliver directors or side-by-side partners? Humility establishes a productive horizontal stance with teachers, rather than a vertical, authoritative stance over them. We can acknowledge and draw on teachers’ expertise and experience while sharing our own.
 
As coaches, it’s important to be confident about what we bring to the table. We can be confident that we are fulfilling our coaching role when we also acknowledge that others bring valid and valuable knowledge and experience. Coaching is a learning journey we undertake together. It is relational work.
 
So yes—be confident. You have knowledge and experience that matter. Lean into the belief that you can make a difference. But hold that confidence with curiosity, and temper it with humility. Quiet confidence, paired with genuine curiosity, invites collaboration and deepens the coaching partnership.
 
 
****************************************************************************************
You can find My Coaches Couch, the podcast (with different content) in your favorite podcast app or at MyCoachesCouch.podbean.com.
 
****************************************************************************************
 

This week, you might want to take a look at:
Instant mood-boosters:
 
https://aestheticsofjoy.com/2020/10/17/8-quick-things-you-can-do-right-now-to-boost-your-mood/
 
 
Family engagement is not an event:
 
https://www.smartbrief.com/original/family-engagement-isnt-an-event-its-a-mindset
 
 
Virtual tutoring can boost learning:
 
https://www.k12dive.com/news/virtual-tutoring-studies-offer-hope-for-early-literacy-outcomes/814091/
 
 
It’s still National Poetry Month - Poetry with paint-chip boards:
 
https://choiceliteracy.com/article/blackout-poems-and-paint-chip-haiku-two-fun-ways-into-poetry-with-adolescents/
 
 
Why positive comments fail (video):
 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eIpk5g0h2lQ
 
That’s it for this week. Happy Coaching!
 
Want more coaching tips? Check out my book, Differentiated Mentoring & Coaching in Education: From Preservice Teacher to Expert Practitioner, available from Teachers College Press!  I’m so excited to share it with you! You can use the code: APR2026 for 15% off. Click  here  and I’ll email you the free Book Group Study Guide that includes questions, prompts, and activities you can use as you share the book with colleagues.  I hope you’ll love this book as much as I loved making it for you!