Friday, January 22, 2021

3 Things Good Listeners Do

Truly listening will help you know how to support others, including the teachers you are coaching.  
Listening is a learnable skill that builds strong relationships and helps us discern needs.  Here are 3 things good listeners do:

1)    Wait.  To sponsor a thoughtful response, we may need to allow for silence – wait time that provides a pause. Silence grants the teacher the opportunity to process both your question and her answer.  This means not rushing in to fill the quiet with words of your own.  A pause for uninterrupted thinking is a courtesy in teachers’ overfull days.  Wait time leads to genuine thinking and understanding; it increases the length and complexity of responses.  It shows that you value the teacher’s thinking. There’s a wise Quaker saying that applies to coaching: “Never miss an opportunity to keep your mouth shut.”

2)    Pay Attention.  Use your body language to show you are listening. Look at the teacher.  Make eye contact. Turn toward them.  Lean in.  Then notice their body language and tone of voice. Listen to understand. Don’t interrupt. Don’t think about what you want to say – think about what they are saying. Don’t jump to conclusions. Stay fully present.  Put aside distracting thoughts.  Try to think about nothing other than the words that are coming out of the teacher’s mouth.  Listen for the ideas that are wrapped up in those words.  Listen for the complete message that is being communicated.

3)    Uptake.  To encourage productive discussion, listen and then “take up” a teacher’s story.  Reflect back what you heard, paraphrasing the ideas the teacher has shared.  You could restate what they seem interested in or excited about.  To make a teller-focused comment, you might say, “It sounds like you…..” or “You must have…,” rather than, “That reminds me of…” and launching into our own story.  Uptake means we acknowledge that we’ve heard.  We show that we understand the teacher’s excitement or frustration.  We note or empathize before moving to analysis.  We receive the information.  


Listening is key to effective communication. Without it, a conversation devolves to ineffective parallel talk – like parallel play, words are happening side-by-side without truly intersecting. There’s no movement or power in such talk.  Effective communication is about more than just exchanging information.  When coaches listen to gain the full meaning of what is being said, teachers feel heard and understood.
 
This week, you might want to take a look at:
 
The 5 D’s of destressing:
 
http://www.ascd.org/publications/newsletters/education-update/dec18/vol60/num12/The-Five-Ds-of-Destressing.aspx
 
 
Digital books as a coaching tool:
 
https://choiceliteracy.com/article/coaching-tool-digital-books/
 
 
Low-tech science (for home or school):
 
https://www.edutopia.org/article/low-tech-scientific-exploration-students-home
 
 
This podcast on hexagonal thinking as a discussion tool:
 
https://www.cultofpedagogy.com/hexagonal-thinking/
 
 
20 interactive teaching activities:
 
https://www.bookwidgets.com/blog/2018/06/20-interactive-teaching-activities-for-in-the-interactive-classroom
 
 
That’s it for this week.  Happy coaching!
 
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