1) Wait. To sponsor a thoughtful response, we may need to allow for silence – wait time that provides a pause. Silence grants the teacher the opportunity to process both your question and her answer. This means not rushing in to fill the quiet with words of your own. A pause for uninterrupted thinking is a courtesy in teachers’ overfull days. Wait time leads to genuine thinking and understanding; it increases the length and complexity of responses. It shows that you value the teacher’s thinking. There’s a wise Quaker saying that applies to coaching: “Never miss an opportunity to keep your mouth shut.”
2) Pay Attention. Use your body language to show you are listening. Look at the teacher. Make eye contact. Turn toward them. Lean in. Then notice their body language and tone of voice. Listen to understand. Don’t interrupt. Don’t think about what you want to say – think about what they are saying. Don’t jump to conclusions. Stay fully present. Put aside distracting thoughts. Try to think about nothing other than the words that are coming out of the teacher’s mouth. Listen for the ideas that are wrapped up in those words. Listen for the complete message that is being communicated.
3) Uptake. To encourage productive discussion, listen and then “take up” a
teacher’s story. Reflect back what you heard, paraphrasing the ideas the teacher
has shared. You could restate what they
seem interested in or excited about. To make a teller-focused comment, you might
say, “It sounds like you…..” or “You must have…,” rather than, “That reminds me
of…” and launching into our own story. Uptake means we acknowledge that we’ve heard. We show that we understand the teacher’s
excitement or frustration. We note or
empathize before moving to analysis. We receive the information.
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