A blog for instructional coaches by Vicki Collet
1) Wait. To sponsor a thoughtful response, we may need to allow for silence – wait time that provides a pause. Silence grants the teacher the opportunity to process both your question and her answer. This means not rushing in to fill the quiet with words of your own. A pause for uninterrupted thinking is a courtesy in teachers’ overfull days. Wait time leads to genuine thinking and understanding; it increases the length and complexity of responses. It shows that you value the teacher’s thinking. There’s a wise Quaker saying that applies to coaching: “Never miss an opportunity to keep your mouth shut.”
2) Pay Attention. Use your body language to show you are listening. Look at the teacher. Make eye contact. Turn toward them. Lean in. Then notice their body language and tone of voice. Listen to understand. Don’t interrupt. Don’t think about what you want to say – think about what they are saying. Don’t jump to conclusions. Stay fully present. Put aside distracting thoughts. Try to think about nothing other than the words that are coming out of the teacher’s mouth. Listen for the ideas that are wrapped up in those words. Listen for the complete message that is being communicated.
3) Uptake. To encourage productive discussion, listen and then “take up” a
teacher’s story. Reflect back what you heard, paraphrasing the ideas the teacher
has shared. You could restate what they
seem interested in or excited about. To make a teller-focused comment, you might
say, “It sounds like you…..” or “You must have…,” rather than, “That reminds me
of…” and launching into our own story. Uptake means we acknowledge that we’ve heard. We show that we understand the teacher’s
excitement or frustration. We note or
empathize before moving to analysis. We receive the information.
In
sports, an invitational is an event that is open only to those who have been invited.
These invitationals are limiting. An invitational mindset for coaching,
however, is an approach that draws teachers in and draws their thoughts out. Rather
than limiting participation, an invitational mindset for coaching expands it.
Coaching should be experienced as invitational. Teachers have a special invitation to jointly explore pedagogy with a coaching colleague. Coaches attract participation in many ways: You may have created a menu of coaching options. Your school may have the expectation that coaching is an “everyone in” activity; one would have to intentionally opt out rather than opting in. In addition to these more overt invitations, an attitude of expectation, of genuine helpfulness, and a bowl of chocolate can go a long way toward drawing teachers in!
People who are Inviting have an abundance attitude. Life is an infinite pie – there are big pieces for everyone! As a coach, you don’t see success as limited to a few – you want it for all, and it shows. Inviting coaches see and share opportunities. Instead of seeing limitations, they see potential. To become more inviting, expand your awareness of opportunities for yourself and others.
Teachers are attracted to coaching when they hear good things from others and when they see the instructional coach figuratively linking arms with others to solve problems and accomplish tasks. They are attracted when an opportunity is personalized – when you base your invitation on a specific need or interest. An inviting person is someone you can go to for support or information.
Drawing Thoughts Out
Once we have invited teachers in, we want to invite them to share their thinking. Teachers will share if we have created safety, value, and freedom.* Teachers feel safe to share their ideas when our attitude and their experience with us confirm that our responses will demonstrate civility and their ideas will be respected. They feel valued when we listen carefully and when we seriously consider the perspectives teachers share. This encourages participation. Teachers feel freedom when you don’t expect them to share your perspective; when they can make a choice other than the suggestion you offer.
An invitational approach avoids coercion. We seek deep understanding of a situation and then offer ideas, but we recognize that the teacher knows what is best for herself and her students.
I welcome a teacher into a conversation when I ask, “What do you think?” Our exchanges are exploratory, our ideas are tentative as we wrestle together with the complex and challenging issues of instruction. Invitational coaches aren’t so pumped up about their own ideas that they overlook a teacher’s concerns. Being over-focused on our own ideas might cause a teacher’s concerns to be overlooked, leading to ineffective instructional decisions.
Coaching is not an opportunity to get our own way. Success is not measured by whether a teacher adopts your views. Rather, decisions are made based on a shared understanding of the context. We recognize that every perspective is partial, and that by seeking multiple perspectives we gain more complete understanding. Silence, reflection, and sincere questioning go both ways in an invitational coaching conversation. Both the coach and teacher may choose to change as a result of sharing perspectives.
Having an invitational mindset for coaching means Inviting teachers in and drawing their ideas out. Ideas emerge and change occurs as a result of an invitational interaction.
*https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Invitational_rhetoric
x
*https://choiceliteracy.com/article/january-8-2021-empowering-choice/
This week I had an uncomfortable self-realization. I noticed I have the habit of restating what someone else has said – perhaps paraphrasing and adding my two cents – as if by offering my opinion, it gives the person’s statement more weight. While this might be helpful when someone is looking for affirmation, it can feel condescending when the person is confident in their own abilities.
I caught myself restating something my husband said. He is generous and recognizes my good intentions – I think it’s really just my way of agreeing with him. But when I noticed what I’d done, I wondered how frequently I do this, and whether others might be offended. I will be on the lookout next week when I am working with expert teachers who feel confident about what they are doing. Unless they are looking for my affirmation, I resolve not to give it. Instead, I’ll offer honest praise.
I wonder whether other coaches have this habit in their personal lives? I wonder if it carries over into their coaching lives, too? I think the habit grows from my teacher self, who always wants to affirm my students. I think it comes from a desire to build them up. Affirming can be the right move, when teaching and when coaching, if the person we’re addressing gives that hint of uncertainty and is looking to grow their practice. If there’s a bit of concern, it is right to confirm. If a teacher is a little uneasy or unsure, an affirmation will be welcome. If you note hesitation or lack of confidence, and what the teacher is doing is having positive results, please affirm! But if the teacher is rolling smoothly along, confident and competent, making a subtle switch from affirmation to pure praise can ensure your comments hit home. Will you resolve with me to be on the lookout for these opportunities?
Instead of reframing a suggestion a teacher makes during planning and describing how it aligns with best practice, just say, “Wow, what a great idea!” Instead of drilling down to why something you observed in a lesson worked, tell the teacher you’ll be recommending this practice to others. Look for opportunities for authentic praise when no affirmation is needed.
Although it’s uncomfortable to notice negative things about myself, I am embracing this realization as an area where I can get better – in my communication with family, friends, and colleagues. As 2021 gets underway, I resolve to stop asserting my own opinions when they are not needed. Instead, I will plainly and publicly praise as appropriate. Will you join me?
