Friday, September 21, 2018

Softening the Recommendation


Stacy is an experienced coach working with a teacher, Sarah, who at first seemed aloof and self-confident. Later, Stacy realized Sarah’s distance is a cover for her self-doubt, that her assurance masks uncertainty.  Like many of the students she teaches, Sarah is a vulnerable learner who sometimes responds defensively when recommendations are offered. 

This week, when Stacy reviewed the lesson plans Sarah had shared via email, she was careful to couch her recommendation about the lesson focus within positive comments about other aspects of the planning. Still, when she met Sarah the next day, Sarah emphatically threw her papers on the table saying, “I changed the whole thing.”  Rather than tweak the lesson as suggested, she had dumped it and started over.  Stacy felt it was a shame that a lesson with so many positive aspects had been scrapped because her recommendation had not been received as intended.  We pondered together how such situations could be avoided in the future and came up with some sentence frames we hope will help:

“So, you could think about….”  This suggestion invites the teacher to ponder the suggestion, reducing pressure to put it into action.  We hope, however, that by decreasing pressure we encourage ownership and action.

“Some things you might want to consider…..”  Similarly, this framing offers the teacher agency to think through what was offered. By providing multiple suggestions, we increase choice.

“Of the things we’ve talked about, what do you want to give some thought to?” Although this phrase also invites contemplation, it requires some of that thinking to occur now, with more commitment.

We hope that these sentence frames will help Stacy structure recommendations that Sarah receives and implements.  I hope that you’ll find them useful as you plan for conversations with teachers who appear less open.


This week, you might want to take a look at:

Moving to an “all in” coaching model:



Make blogging an authentic classroom activity:



Steven King’s top 20 rules for writers:



Ideas for combatting school-year stress:



A free, recorded webinar, “How to Talk About Race in Your Classroom”:


That’s it for this week.  Happy Coaching!

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