Two Powerful Words for Coaching Conversations

What if two little words could lower defensiveness, increase cognitive flexibility, support experimentation, strengthen collaboration, and position teachers as thinkers? In coaching conversations, the words, “What if?” can do just that. I’ve noticed how these simple words spark conversations that inspire growth. “What if?” can frame an idea as a topic for exploration rather than a directive. It proposes possibilities that can stretch thinking in productive ways.
 
Offering Invitations
Asking, “What if?” increases openness. Instead of feeling defensive because a recommendation is offered, a teacher who hears, “What if?” feels an entry point. “What if” sounds exploratory, helping the conversation unfold. We share ideas in ways that communicate respect, honoring the expertise of the teacher in front of us.
 
After a conversation with Angela’s team about the research on class behavior charts (problems with the “clip up,” “clip down” system), she lingered; she was concerned about the behavior chart that had been in her classroom for years.
 
“What should I be doing?” she asked. She expressed frustration about the lack of PD on classroom management.
 
I commiserated and added, “There are some kids, like we said, who need something more tangible along with having appropriate expectations modeled and taught.”
 
“The thing is,” Angela countered, “I really only end up using the behavior chart for a few kids. Most kids just stay on green.”
 
This was where a “What if” could get traction. “What if you got rid of the behavior chart and put a more private practice in place for those few students who needed it? Could that work? What might that look and sound like?” What if’s can be an invitation to create a plan for moving forward.
 
Teachers Doing the Thinking
When coaches ask, “What if?” they affirm that the teachers is capable of careful analysis and professional judgment. Rather than delivering a solution, you’re offering a possibility and trusting the teacher to examine it. It says, “This is a thought experiment. You know your context. Let’s explore this together.”
 
When I ask, “What if students generated their own questions before reading?” or “I wonder where partner talk might fit into this lesson,” I am not handing over a finished solution. I am inviting the teacher into inquiry.
 
When we frame ideas as possibilities rather than prescriptions, we signal that teachers’ knowledge of their students matters in determining whether the idea is worth pursuing. Asking, “What if?” supports professional agency, strengthens confidence, and reinforces the relationship of respect.
 
Collaborative Partnership
“What if?” communicates that we are thinking about this together. Coaching isn’t a top-down dynamic – it is shared inquiry, with both of us bringing curiosity to the context. That shift from telling to thinking together leads to rich professional dialogue and strengthens the coaching partnership.
 
During team meetings, collective thinking is expanded and ideas can multiply!  I saw this in action while planning a lesson on equivalent fractions with two excellent third-grade teachers. One teacher expressed concern about students’ lack of background knowledge. The other shared that using a balance scale had helped in the past. Then I added, “What if you used modeling clay on the balance scale — equal blobs on each side — and then divided them into halves and quarters to show equivalence?” That idea wasn’t mine alone. It grew from their concerns and prior experience. Everyone had ownership.
 
When ideas emerge through dialogue—when a teacher names a concern, recalls a prior success, and together we extend the thinking—ownership is distributed.
 
When we ask “What if?” in response to a teacher’s expressed need, we extend the teacher’s thinking. Improvement is a shared endeavor, not a delivered prescription. Joint ownership increases commitment because teachers have shaped the ideas.  Improvement happens through co-construction rather than compliance.
 
Flexibility and Growth
When we ask, “What if?” we present ideas as something to consider rather than something to unquestioningly implement. “What if?” can gently disrupt habitual patterns and routines that have outlived their usefulness. Asking, “What if?” can stretch thinking, allowing new possibilities to emerge while still honoring what is already working.
 
“What if?” invites teachers to imagine alternatives and compare outcomes. It kindles hypotheses and experimentation. That experimental mindset reduces pressure and increases willingness to try something new. This mental flexibility fosters innovation and growth.
 
Two Small Words
When “What if?” reflects genuine curiosity, ideas are carefully examined, reasoning is articulated, and shared expertise is elevated. These two small words, asked with sincerity and respect, create space for thinking, Potent change can begin with two small words and a posture of curiosity.
 
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Did you know My Coaches Couch is also a podcast? (with different content) Find it in your favorite podcast app or at MyCoachesCouch.podbean.com
 
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This week, you might want to take a look at:

Using AI to boost writing without compromising human connection:
 
https://www.the74million.org/article/how-ai-is-helping-nyc-english-teachers-improve-middle-school-reading-and-writing/
 
 
Balancing literacy and play:
 
https://www.edutopia.org/article/balancing-play-literacy-mandates-preschool
 
 
Sketchnoting to increase retention:
 
https://choiceliteracy.com/article/sketchnoting-in-the-library/
 
 
Careful words for coaching:
 
https://barkleypd.com/blog/coaches-words-and-questions/
 
 
Reasons to do an author study:
https://www.readingrockets.org/books/authorstudy/reasons
 
That’s it for this week. Happy Coaching!
 
Want more coaching tips? Check out my book, Differentiated Mentoring & Coaching in Education: From Preservice Teacher to Expert Practitioner, available from Teachers College Press!  I’m so excited to share it with you! You can use the code: FNDS26 for 15% off. Click  here  and I’ll email you the free Book Group Study Guide that includes questions, prompts, and activities you can use as you share the book with colleagues.  I hope you’ll love this book as much as I loved making it for you!